Emotional Intelligence


22Jul 2010

From Morse Code to 3D Movies: What Kind of Communicator Are You?

Recently, I was working with a husband and wife who also own and run a business together. One of the issues that came up was their differences in communicating, and how this creates challenges in their relationship (both personally and as co-managers). I used a “word picture” that helped illustrate the difficulties they are experiencing in communicating with one another.

08Jul 2010

Understanding the Nature of Trust

I wrote about trust in business relationships a few months ago. But the issue of trust in relationships keeps coming up again and again in the work I do. Really, it is the lack of trust that continues to reappear. The issue is so foundational to healthy relationships, I feel compelled to write on the topic again – and explain

06Jun 2010

Walking, Jogging & Sprinting: Some Observations and Life Lessons

Recently, I went to our state high school track and field championship meet — it is a wonderful spectacle — thousands of student athletes, coaches, friends and family members in one stadium. Vibrant colors are displayed in the uniforms, supportive T-shirts and baseball caps, and tents (to keep the students out of the sun). Lots of sunshine, sunscreen and water

12May 2010

Understanding Why We Make the Financial Decisions We Do

There is a relatively new field of social science (i.e. the study of social behavior) called behavioral economics. It has been around for about 10 years formally. And two of the leaders in the field (Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky) received a Nobel prize a few years back. As a psychologist, initially I had a bit of a cynical view

07Mar 2010

Creative Problem-Solving: Ways to Communicate When the Other Person Just Doesn't "Get It"

My wife (Kathy) and I have been married 30 years. We are both college-educated and fairly good communicators. Most people understand us when we talk or write. But sometimes we have a hard time communicating with each other. It is not that we don’t try, or that one of us doesn’t want to understand. But occasionally (I think it is

21Nov 2009

The Opposite(s) of Thanksgiving

We usually think of opposites in terms of a simple, “either-or” relationship — such as light and darkness, large and small, heavy and light. And these opposites exist on a single continuum, with the opposing characteristics being on the ends of the spectrum. But there are some relationships which are more complex, where there is more than one characteristic that

15Nov 2009

Mentoring — Transferring Information & Experience to the Next Generation

I started reading a good book this week — A Game Plan for Life: The Power of Mentoring by John Wooden and Don Yaeger. It was recommended to me by a good friend, and I always try to pass on worthwhile reading to others. The first part of the book covers the seven mentors that influenced Coach Wooden (for those

10Oct 2009

Understanding Violence: Anger + Constant Violent Images + Poor Impulse Control + Societal Acceptance

Recently, there has been an “outrage” expressed in the media and in some communities about the continued increase in violence in our country. About two weeks ago an honor student was beaten to death by peers in Chicago — and the violence was captured by cell phones. In response to this incident a number of community leaders have called for

27Sep 2009

Anxiety—A Major Driving Force: Understanding It and Managing It

I don’t know about you but a lot of my daily life can be contaminated by anxiety— not major, life-crippling anxiety, but those small little worries about daily life activities and events. And if I am not careful, anxiety can almost rule my day. While I’m doing one thing, I’m worrying about the next event or meeting. What a waste.

19Sep 2009

Some Notes from Leadership Seminars by Cloud & Townsend — Good Business Leadership Isn't Emotionless

This week I had the opportunity to attend a conference where both John Townsend (author of Boundaries) and Henry Cloud (author of Integrity) spoke on leadership.  Here are some notes of thoughts that I felt were interested and helpful. John Townsend Research is verifying the relationship between character, interpersonal skills and performance outcomes.  That is, if you work on the

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