Parenting Adult Children


01Dec 2013

Transitioning into Young Adulthood — 5 Steps for a Smoother Pathway

Recently, a few Baby Boomer parents have talked with me about the difficulties their young adult children are experiencing in transitioning from college into adulthood — and asked me to write some tips for young adults to help make this season of their life go better.  Ok, so here are my thoughts. First, let’s understand why so many young people

13Jan 2013

The Dangerous Pathway of Rescuing Others from Their Choices

I have been working with families, kids, teens and young adults for 30 years now.  One of the most common challenges I see individuals experience is knowing when to let their family members experience the results of their choices and when to intervene and “rescue” them from the negative consequences they will be facing. (Interestingly, the situation often occurs with

01Apr 2011

5 Bad Ways to Choose a Career

Sometimes we focus on the right way to do a task.  But other times it is helpful to look at the wrong way to do something. In my career coaching with students, young & older adults, I have seen some patterns of bad ways that people have attempted to choose their career direction — and rarely do these approaches work. 

05Dec 2010

It's Time to Think about the 4th of July

Yes, I know it is winter and Christmas is approaching quickly. No, this isn’t about keeping warm by visualizing warmer weather. Now is the time to start thinking about a family “get together” next summer. If you want to have family events, a holiday weekend, or even a common family vacation, you need to start planning now. Many of us

28Nov 2010

Using Family Traditions to Transfer Family Values

A common issue for most of the families with whom I work is the desire to pass their core values on to the next generations (children and grandchildren). Utilizing family traditions, especially during the holidays, can be extremely impactful in this process. Let me share from our family’s experience — how family traditions can intertwine with reinforcing important family values.

14Nov 2010

Common Concerns in Transferring Wealth — Confirmations from Princeton

Last week I had the opportunity and privilege of being one of three facilitators at an event at Princeton University entitled, “Conversations about Family, Wealth & Philanthropy”. With my long-time friend, Doug Bauer (CEO of the Clark Foundation, formerly of Rockefeller Philanthropy Advisors) and my new friend, William Zabel (well-know estate planning attorney in NYC and author of The Rich

24Oct 2010

Reflecting Reality — Sometimes Means Telling People Things They Don't Want to Hear

When working with people in my role as a coach or counselor, I often tell them that part of my role is to “reflect reality” to them — to give them objective and honest feedback on how I see their situation, and what choices they actually have (versus the choices they wish they have). Some examples include: *Helping family business

21Jun 2010

Reflections on Father's Day — From A Variety of Perspectives

This past Father’s Day was the first, as far as I can remember, since my oldest children (twins) were born 27 years ago that I was away from all of my children. I am on a business trip that carried over the weekend, so I am away from my family. On one hand, it was weird and lonely. On the

22Mar 2010

Similarities and Differences Across the World

I just returned from a week in Istanbul, Turkey, speaking at a conference, meeting with families, and doing some sightseeing. And I was struck by the similarities of issues that exist half away around the world, within cultures that have incredible differences. First, I need to let you know that Istanbul is a beautiful, beautiful city with incredible history, architecture,

22Jan 2010

Healthy Extended Families — They Do Actually Exist

In the past several weeks, I have had the opportunity to interact with a few large extended families — both at a personal and professional level. And I have been impressed with some common characteristics I observed across these families, whom I view to be relatively healthy and functional. Given the bashing that extended families take in TV shows and

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